What would your advice be?
On Monday, I told you I spent my past week learning and I shared some resources which contained where I went to learn and who I was learning from.
As mentioned in that letter, I joined the boundary summit which was held over the weekend, and I want to share a lesson I picked from that summit.
There was one thing almost every in that event mentioned, and that was value.
Every one of them mentioned that the boundary you set or is willing to set is always influenced by what your values are.
This value is something that you hold in high esteem, and whether you acknowledge it or not, it influences every decision you make.
I'm not really a fan of Nollywood movies, because I feel most of them are predictable, and yes, I judge the rest with this mindset.
However, today, my friend shared a recent movie she watched with me and I just had to pick lessons from it.
And chill! I'm sharing too, but not the entire movie. I obviously didn't pay attention to all of it.
In the movie, the actress whom I'll just call Judith met a man on her trip to Dubai. A trip she took to heal from a breakfast she was just served.
He was handsome, rich, and sweet. He had all the qualities she wanted in a man. Coming back to Nigeria, she found he even had a big house and cars.
She fell in love again, and she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. As nature may have it, he proposed to her after a few weeks.
I guess they were both eager to get married. They moved in together, to plan the marriage ceremony effectively.
One morning, she woke up and she couldn't find her husband beside her.
Why did he get up so early? He doesn't have work today nah. She wondered.
She left the room, to go find him and know what he's up to.
I don't know why she couldn't call. Don't ask me. It's probably a female instinct.
It was a big house, so she has a hard time finding him.
She finally did though, at a room downstairs, and guess what? He was making out with a man.
Turns out her husband-to-be liked men.
She went to get advice from her friends, family, and even pastors.
Everyone advised her based on their values (the things they held in high esteem).
Her mum said she should stay in the marriage because it'll be shameful to call off a marriage that was already fixed. Guess her value? Public appearance (reputation).
Her friend advised her to blackmail the dude and cash out from the relationship. Guess her value? Finance.
Her first Pastor told her to bring him for counseling, that he will be delivered. Guess his value? WO! I dunno too.
Her other pastor told her to end the relationship because it won't make her happy. Guess his value? Living a completely happy life.
What would your advice be?
The first answer you thought of, is linked to your value, and you should check it.
Is it the kind of value that will propel you to live a life of positive influence?
Is it the kind of value that needs to be worked on and changed?
Whatever it is, make sure your value is something that works for you, and not something that contradicts your dream.
We'll talk again on Friday, till then,
You're amazing, you're wonderful and you deserve all the good things you get and more.
I'm Bridget.